Afraid of Having Tall Kids?

As a blogger, I get lots of emails and questions and sometimes they have nothing to do with fashion.  I love my readers and am excited that some of you trust me enough with your deepest thoughts. Some of your emails weigh heavy on my mind!  Over the last few years, a few of you have expressed concern and anxiety over your future and fears of being a parent. In particular some of you are extremely anxious about reproducing tall children.

Now, I know this is a valid fear for some of you. After all, perhaps you’ve been bullied or struggled with self-esteem issues you believe have stemmed from your height.  Many of you hold your head high, but secretly are just trying to figure out ways to feel more comfortable in your skin.

I understand! Don’t think for a moment that I didn’t have some of these issues cross my mind. I haven’t always been overly confident.  My middle school years were brutal! I had a lot of negative self-talk and internalized the things insecure short boys said to me.  It’s hard trying to fit in when your clothes don’t fit correctly and you’re standing taller than most everyone around. Around my sophomore year of high school, I experienced a mind shift and finally  decided there was nothing I could do about my height, so it was time to embrace myself, stand tall and proud and love myself.  I began to blossom. I now see my height as one of my greatest positives and hope all tall people everywhere can get to the same point.

krista mayne family tall family

But, thankfully I wasn’t afraid of having tall kids. Perhaps, it’s because my want to be a Mother has always been so strong since the time I was a little girl. It could be a religious/cultural thing as becoming a  Mother is what everyone around me did when they grew up. Maybe I never really thought about it.  But here are a few truths I do know.

  • Kids are my greatest source of happiness and joy and I can’t imagine life without them. To let a bit of fear rob me from never having my greatest creations, would just be silly.
  • Anytime one reproduces, there is no guarantee that the child’s body or mind will be perfect.  It’s all a crap shoot.  But, my husband and I trust that God that he will send us the children we need and that need us. If they resemble my husband and I, it’s a bonus!
  • If you are experiencing unusual levels of anxiety or obsessive/compulsive thoughts, perhaps it’s time to see a professional counselor. You may have deep issues with your upbringing or with bullying that you haven’t resolved.   I’m a big believer in mental health counseling and have seen some huge changes in loved ones that have gone through this process.
  • My husband and I are pretty smart cookies and by having children, we’re just trying to raise the IQ rate in this country. (Just kidding.)

Ok, so this post is a bit sappy, but I promised some of you that I would respond more thoroughly to your questions. For whatever reason, I feel like now’s the time.   I’m not here to preach that everyone should have kids as I believe this is a very personal choice. However, don’t let the fear of your children growing up tall hold you back. After all, you are a “tall expert” and have within yourself all the skills and knowledge to help your kids feel loved and grow up with healthy levels of self-esteem.

Please know that you are beautiful and it’s up to you to let your confidence show, even if you need to fake it until you believe it! I want to know your experiences, please leave a comment below with your thoughts on this subject.

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Comments

  1. Genuinely enjoyed your post about having tall kids. I, too, genuinely hoped that by marrying a man that was slightly shorter than my 6’4″ frame that we might produce a smaller next generation. But alas, God thought otherwise and we are the proud owners of a 6’5″ son and 6’2″ (so far!) daughter. It will never be easy to be larger than life in a society filled with people striving to look exactly like the “normal” people seen in the movies. However, I try to remind my daughter especially (since its much harder on girls) that we must be forever grateful for our health and happiness. I firmly believe “Every good and perfect gift cometh from above.” We are the way we are for a reason and it is our mission in life to discover how we can use our good and perfect gift.

  2. Carol Hartman says:

    You are wise beyond your years. I so enjoyed your response today. I also believe God gives us the kids we will love the most, no matter their physical or mental attributes. Life would be so boring if we all were one size; bring on what we need and love always finds the way! The happiest of New Years to you and yours; you are indeed a gift to your lucky family that God gave you, and hugs as well!

  3. Totally enjoyed this post! I have three children, boy, girl, boy; and I was actually foolish enough to worry about this. I don’t know if they’ll be tall or short, as they are still young, but no matter what; I will love them just the same!

  4. Krista Mayne says:

    Thank you all! I’m trying to use this platform for good and it’s nice to know this post was well received. I’m thankful for all my kids and my boys will all be really tall, and my daughter short. Some of them have special issues, but I love them all the same and am so grateful to have each of them!
    Thanks for all of your support and kind words!

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